All shalt lose, for verily ist the number 42 condusive to lose-age.
Also shalt thou wander round Camden Town looking for a job (as there is verily nowhere left in Muswell Hill thou hast not tried) and, not entirely unexpectedly, totally fail to find one.
Thou shalt write a random large amount on Saturday night and then nothing else for a week. All writing prophets shalt hereby be stuck. Apart from the Random Prophet Of Randomly Prolific Randomness, who shalt not.
Verily do we miss Thor, Angelica, Squiz etc and thusly have they moved into my head. And I thought the Angels etc were weird...
Prophets may post random long ranting truths if they so feel like, especially if they hast been a lazy arse and not looked at the board for the past week or two.
- The Author Of All That Is Finally Planned Out So That I know Pretty Much What HAppens Where, Apart From What's Happening Right Now And The Fact That Cronos Keeps Appearing In Places I've Decided He Shouldn't Be And Generally Getting In The Way.
Edited by: Vitriolic Butterfly at: 10/9/02 10:41:01 am
43.
Yea, losage shall prevail.
but other than that, it shalt be deemed a really bad idea to start laughing hysterically and uncontrollably for absolutely no reason (other than that thou art painfully exhausted) in the middle of thy French lessons. For verily, thou shalt get bollocked by teacher, in French. And all through thy bollocking, thou shalt continue creasing up, and thou shalt get in enough trouble to be sent to the deputy head. And yet, though shalt continue to laugh.
- She Who Shall Be Hereby Perceived As Totally Insane By her Entire Class.
44.
Thou shalt have very sore feet, for thy chemistry lecture theatre shalt lie miles away from thy maths and evolutionary biology ones, and shalt fall between the two. Thou shalt also be most narked at the fact that thou hast exactly three minutes between lectures to get to said distant lecture theatre and back.
In conclusion, thou shalt surrender to Cambridge stereotype and get a bike before thy legs fall off.
The timetable-challenged Charmed Quirk
45.
Whilst thou art on the topic of stereotypical Cambridge students, thou shalt wonder why in the hell thou hast signed up for rowing, along with five other college sports, especially when thou hast no sporting ability whatsoever.
The bemused Charmed Quirk
Edited by: The tapdancing typewriter at: 10/10/02 10:03:46 pm
46.
Thou shalt get tremendously excited when thou learnst that thou canst get a half blue for archery at Cambridge. Marvellous.
- She Who Shall Be Hereby Known As P-Twang!
47.
Verily shalt truth number 46 be true. But then, thou canst get a quarter blue for tiddlywinks.
The rowing, arching (?), lacrosse, football, hockey and frisbee playing Charmed Quirk
48.
Verily, the big poncy public school that my dad went to was the national chapions at both tiddlywinks and bridge for aobut 150 years. And verily werest thou all desperate to know that. - a random prophet of random randomness.
49.
Also shalt thou be tremendously pleased when thou actually obtains crystals from thy diacid, as opposed to blowing up the lab. Verily must there be something in the Cambridge air that makes experiments work properly.
The smugly competent scientist Charmed Quirk
50.
Thou shalt refrain from going totally spare when thou hast spent the best part of half an hour searching the learned tomes of Trinity Hall library for the dissociation constant of hydrochloric acid, only to give up and ask Jeeves.
Thou shalt, however, be totally at thine liberty to go spare when Jeeves produces his table of constants, and the entry for hydrochloric acid reads merely 'Strong'.
The academically frazzled Charmed Quirk
Thou shalt completely phuck up the Oxfam till on thy second day as a volunteer. Thou shalt also refrain from buying a donated fluffy black coat which verily dost look covetable but wouldst probably not fit. And finally, thou shalt refrain from rescuing a Superman t-shirt which wast going in the recycling bin merely because someone in your head wishes to own one.
- The Author Of All That Is Charitable
52.
Thou shalt honour Truth 2, of the second book.
Thou shalt also be richly amused when thy fellow prophets all rush back to see what it was.
The impishly point making Charmed Quirk
53.
Thou shalt dress up thy wooden arty mannekins (sp) which verily failed to stop being Cassius even when they didst wear a skirt and performest a move from West Side Story as Frankenfurter. It shalt be too perfect for words.
Also shalt it make all vampires, elves, angels, footballers and random psychic people do Rocky Horror and spendest a strangely long time arguing over who's playing Frank (Zerrin, Darius or Michael Owen?). But verily shalt Karl, Taurus and Rhys continue to be Rocky, Janet and the Criminologist respectively.
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