'I don't know how it happened.I don't think I want to know anymore.I just want to sit here breathing.It feels ..I don't know but it makes me feel pure. I guess it sounds weird but then again you probably don't feel it the way I do. I'm lucky to be alive that's what the doctor's said but he wasn't so lucky. It's sad I can't even think his name without feeling guilty.

My parent's they can't even look at me anymore.Once right after the accident I made eye contact with mom for a second it was only a second and she just burst into tears.my dad he hugged her and looked at me out of the corner of his eye.There was nothing there nothing no sadness no pity no anger just nothin. He's different now and to think I did that to him.Me I was i mean am just sixteen I guess it doesn't feel that way anymore though.

I don't remember much except lights and noise and music and the smile. There was a smile on his face the was last time he ever smiled.No matter how hard I try I can't get the image out of my head.the lighs too so many of them bright and blinking then there was the noise.There were screams most from me and rory..I can't beleive I actually wrote his name.There it is though in black and white. he was so young and full of life and energy and potential. I destroyed that .

It hurts Oh I can't decribe the pain .it's not like cuts or bruises .it's like a blackhole opening and swallowing you up but slowly and painfully. slowly you can feel each cell from your skin going down it and it kills . They said it wasn't my fault it could have happened to anyone . I know better though I wasn't supposed to be driving that night they told me it was dangerous and to let Rory take a bus. At least they didn't say I told you so I couldn't have taken that. i would have cracked.You may think I've cracked but I'm not there not yet. The police they should me the black ice were I skidded on was. I didn't remember it any clearer though. It's still so foggy .

Sometimes I wake up and think he's alive.last night I ran into his bedroom and mom was there too.We sat together.It may sound pathetic but it was an improvement. After mom was asleep I went back to my room .I waited cause I knew if she wasn't asleep after I left she would have gone back in there. She tortures herself enough these days. I don't really know what else to write so I'll stop.

Ashleigh put down the pencil and wordlessly got up. She walked over to her mirror and stared at herself.How long has it been since I brushed my hair or changed my clothes? she thought looking at herself again.she looked at her face again Murderer she thought tears welling in her eyes.

"SHUT UP" she screamed punching the mirror ,trying not to cry .Glass scattered everywhere she stared at the peices grasping her bleeding hand.

Oh, this is the start of something good
Don't you agree?
I haven't felt like this in so many moons
You know what I mean?
And we can build through this destruction
As we are standing on our feet
So, since you want to be with me
You'll have to follow through
With every word you say
And I, all I really want is you
You to stick around
I'll see you everyday
But you have to follow through
You have to follow through

oooh lol i didnt know you where going to start it, sounds good ! lol Coffee hurry! haha

More than just a pretty face

Oh, this is the start of something good
Don't you agree?
I haven't felt like this in so many moons
You know what I mean?
And we can build through this destruction
As we are standing on our feet
So, since you want to be with me
You'll have to follow through
With every word you say
And I, all I really want is you
You to stick around
I'll see you everyday
But you have to follow through
You have to follow through