No, it's not normal
There are so many things that I wish others knew about autism, but here's something that has been on my mind lately.
When I speak of my child's challenges or when I share a concern about something I observed, please don't downplay my child's behavior or tell me that "head banging is just an attention getting device" (for example). Until you've been in my "Parent of Austistic Children" shoes, don't demean what I'm experiencing or worried about...
I guess just like any issue in parenting, others seem to think they know what is best for your child regardless of the issues you face, and whether or not they even have kids!
I have fallen totally in love with my clients. I know that what I feel is only minor compared to how their parents feel about them. When I am working with them I see glimpses of who they are....and I can see what behaviors have to do with the Autism, and yes even some behaviors that are of a typical 4 year old....
I can't even begin to imagine how hard it is for parents, even if the moments are rare, to see their child, if only for a second, and then the moment is gone. Some parents are not fortunate enough to even have a moment like that.....
To love a child in the way only a parent does, and to watch your little one trapped within must be excrutiating to say the least.
Re: No, it's not normal
Oh, the head banging is the worst, and people look at you like
your spoiling them when you see they are getting frustrated and you go out of your way to keep them calm.
But some good friends of mine who have spent enough time to get to know him say it is amazing how he gets his point across without any words, and I say and make you feel stupid when he does.
I was trying to get something on TV for him so I could get mama things done and he screamed at the beginning of every-thing I put on. So I put the cases in front of him and said show me and he pushed them all away and looked at me as if to say " I already told you NONE OF THEM!"
Re: No, it's not normal
I wish everyone could be as soft spoken, kind-hearted, loving, gentle, patient, understanding, compassionate, down-at-their-eye-level to all children. I've learned so much about child psycology, behaviour, etc. by watching my best friend (who works with children in school and has a 6 yr old child herself with "diagnosed issues") and she possess all those traits. Kids love her and swarm to her. If people could just remember what it was like when they were small, how different the world seems, how differently you think, act, understand, etc. when you only have the years you've been on this earth as experience. The human body is one of the most complex things on this earth to understand and figure out how it all works together. One little thing in our brain not functioning properly and it could mess up an entire wiring system and make life very difficult for a child. I know, I'm one of those children now an adult with children with problems. Do I sound "hippyish" yet? (haha) I need to see life through the eyes of a child to remind me of how simple things should be. Love, respect, compassion, patience and understanding is "what the world needs now" to treat everyone as you want to be treated.
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