I would recommend talking with a priest or some other trusted neutral party (like a financial advisor, not a family member!) about your financial situation if you feel there may be problems combining your incomes or taking on each others' debts. This was something that my hubby and I hashed out prior to engagement, and it was an easy course for us when we came to our pre-marriage counseling sessions. Some people have issues with this part of marriage, but you need to look at it in advance. Decide where the money will come from in your joint budget to pay off these debts, and promise not to take on new debts until these are paid off. It's not just the problems with handling money that help marriages collapse... it's the stress of missed payments, lack of money to pay for necessities (no food, b/c you bought 3 new DVDs) that causes stress in the marriage and a failed partnership.

My hubby and I married with the understanding that his income was going to be the primary one, and I was going to work to help off-set bills if needed. I had $13,000 in college loans after college (when we married) which I paid off by working for one year as an office manager. We lived on my hubby's income only, and put all my money towards that debt and refused to use credit cards.

After 1 year of work, I gave birth to our first son, and started my life as a stay at home mom (SAHM). Our understanding was that my hubby made the money, and I saved it! Notice it isn't 'spend'.... it's 'saved'! We hubby is in the Army, so we have a consistent paycheck with small raises that we can count on. We live off his income and my job is to find all the ways to save his money, from using great new recipes, e-zines with saving tips, shopping with coupons, buying clothes at good prices, paying for things in advance and not going into debt ever.

The best principle that we're now using is to pay for things in advance! My hubby and I own two cars (Ford Escort and Honda Odyssey, both bought new) and they are completely paid for. The money that WAS going to be used for payments is now in a fund to earn more money and pay for our car in full next time we upgrade. Another friend just took her family of 6 on a fantastic weeklong Disney vacation, paid for in advance! There is no reason to go into debt for these types of things.

Some tips:
Agree on spending limits for certain things, such as birthday gifts for family members, outings, vacations, car payments, investments, college funds, etc. Put money away in advance for your gift buying at Christmas. It's cheaper b/c you are earning money on the amt you are saving, instead of paying interest on the amt you borrowed!
Buy store brands if they are cheaper than regular brands with coupons. They taste the same (usually) and save you $. One shopping tip I like to try is to stick to the outside of the store only, which is where you find the produce, dairy, meat and bread sections-- your complete foods! Anything in the middle is processed and expensive!
Write down something you want to buy/ need to buy, and start saving for it. If you still NEED it 2 weeks from now (such as a tool or jacket) then you probably really need it and can now afford it. If you don't need it b/c you found another way to use it or found it somewhere cheaper, then put the money away in another account to save for when you DO need something, and congratulate yourself on not buying it! Impulse buying is the root of all evil for any budget!
Make your grocery list before you go shopping. Stick to it! If you see something you need, see the rule above. Only things you truly need are allowed in your shopping cart.

This system has been working for us for 8 years now. Hubby and I have no debts (aside from house), 2 cars paid for, 2 kids in private Christian preschool, $1,000+ going into savings and college funds each month, and just one income from the Army. Just plan things in advance, share your goals and dreams with each other now so you can plan for them and enjoy them together!
~Danielle
Ft. Hood, TX